SLIDER

The Xx Live in Houston 2017



//May 9, 2017//
My closest friend invited me out on a spontaneous night out to see The Xx! 
To be honest, I didn't  know a lot of their music, but I was familiar with the band.
It was such a great night filled with dancing and bumping into *drunk* people (lol). 
Thanks Alanis for taking me out! You're the best!

Here are a few photos I took from the concert!


I hope you're having a great day! x
M.

Life Update No8: New Job, Theatre, and Mental Health


Happy Monday! Again, it has been a while since my last post.. I've just been a bit busy lately with my job (yes I landed a job lol), and catching up with some of my closest friends. To be honest, everything has been rough lately. I'm STILL anxious about everything and it is driving me crazy. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have my emotional support group (aka my girlfriends). Ugh, I love them so much. I have no idea why they still put up with the mess I make lol.

Okay, this post is going to be a little bit of a "sob-fest", so you're very welcome to stop reading and exit if you don't feel like reading another one of my "writing is my therapy" post haha. I'm so sorry if I keep doing this. 😅 Okay... on to the three things I want to talk about!


1. I got a part-time job! 

  • I'm currently working at my job for over three weeks now. Tbh, I struggled during the first week and I wanted to quit so bad. But over time, I learned to enjoy it and I really like my co-workers! They are so fun to talk with and they make time fly by so fast! Nothing better than having a job that doesn't feel like one! I got lucky with this one.  
2. Dreamgirls
  • I recently watched a preview performance of Dreamgirls here in Houston (thanks to one of my friends for the free tickets)! I have never seen the movie adaptation (the one with Beyonce) or the play, so I have no idea what it was about. It was pretty good! Not one of my faves, to be honest. But it was good. Very entertaining... and the cast was crazy awesome! I loved Jimmy's rap song!!! I think Jimmy was my favorite just because he made me laugh so hard that I cried a little.

3. My crippling anxiety (ohhhhh noooooooo not again!!!)
  • I have been beating myself up too much lately, and I basically feel like... idk crap?? (haha). I am just too tough on myself that I blame everything on myself, it's not even healthy anymore. But you know, if you're an over thinker like me, it's really hard not to. You guys don't know how many times (in the last few weeks) I've cried myself to sleep at night. I always think that I am not good enough, and it sucks big time. It was the mixture of feeling left behind in school, feeling ignored, and feeling stuck! However, I am trying sooooo hard to stay positive and push away all the negativity that clouds my thoughts every now and then. I am so thankful that I have a job to distract me, a supportive group of friends and a loving family that never fail to make me feel better. 
  • Okay, let's talk about self love... Before you can feel 100%, you first have to fully love and accept yourself. Love your flaws because nobody is perfect. ALSO! Stop comparing yourself to other people!!! This is what always makes me feel soooo low. I have a really bad habit of comparing myself to other people on screen which is terrible because most of the things on social media are filtered! Compare yourself to yourself yesterday, that way you can see your progress. 
  • Ahhhh my mind is a huge mess I don't even know if this post makes sense but whatever I'll keep going. About my anxiety... I have recently developed some trust issues which made my anxiety and overthinking tendencies a lot worse. I have so much doubt that I rely on Google haha. "What does he/she mean when he/she says....." ahhh it's so terrible! Is it just me??? 😅😂 Anyway, so my anxiety is still here but I've learned and experienced so many things because of it. I have been trying to be brave and actually go out and do stuff, which is good right?! I guess sometimes you just have to dive in to fight the shadows in your head. 
I hope you're having a really good day. Thank you for reading!
M.

Anxiety and Overthinking



(Writing is my therapy. In writing this, I am letting go of some negativity. I will probably rant about some stuff, so you've been warned haha!) Also shoutout to my girl Alanis for taking these photos! Your work is always amazing.
I'm probably one of the worst when it comes to overthinking everything. I always find myself thinking about the "what ifs" and just basically all the possibilities (mostly negative) that could happen no matter what the situation is. Recently, one of my friends made me take a personality test. (I've taken one in the past and I got INFJ.) So I took this new test and still got INFJ-T. The "T" stands for turbulent which means you're self-conscious and care too much about what other people think and feel about you. I scored 92% turbulent. Basically I'm an introverted mess

Recent events made me rethink and overthink (lol) about how I always care too much. Being an introvert, I get emotionally attached way too easily which is such a terrible thing!!! A simple compliment from a stranger at a store would stick, I can get attached to a dog if it licked my ankle (let's be honest, that's too cute)... But you know, it can get worse.. I can get attached to someone who randomly told me I was beautiful,  and even attached to someone who asked me out even if he totally "ghosted" me after a few days. Okay let's not talk about the details haha! I guess I saw a small glimmer of hope because I really try to believe that everybody is naturally good and I don't know... I felt so special?? It kinda sounds like I'm a fool now that I'm writing about it. 😬 I know we can't please everybody, but it's so hard to accept it sometimes.
In some cases, people overthink about "simple" situations like results of a test, and diving into unexplored territories... In my case, my biggest fear is the unknown. I tend to get really anxious about anything new because I'm too scared of failing or embarrassing myself. You might be already thinking how I'm such a huge mess hahaha. Anyway, I have to agree about what they say about the mind being really powerful. It can really build or destroy you, and it's up to you what you feed your mind. Although it's hard, (especially for people like me) but we have to deal it with.  Overthinking is like being trapped floating/falling down a bottomless pit. Sometimes you feel like there is no escaping it. But there are some ways to escape it! If you struggle with anxiety and overthinking, try releasing your stress. Try writing, working out, going offline, or talking to a close friend. Just distract yourself from whatever is making you anxious. I know your struggle. 

These photos were taken a few days ago. My friend invited me to go out, enjoy the weather, and do what we love to do - take photos. (Thanks Alanis!)

If you're feeling down, I am sending you love!
Thanks for reading this huge mess.
M.

I Shopped the Kids Section & Other Petite Girl Problems


Here's the situation... I absolutely dread going shopping. Being a 20 year old woman with a body of a 13 year old, limits my options when buying clothes and whatnot. Nothing from the women's section fits me perfectly!! Does anybody have the same struggle? It's so hard being petite!
Once a while my mom and I would go out and go clearance shopping. Most of the time, I would go straight to the X-Small to Small racks. But I figured why not try out the kids' section?! Recently, I've noticed that kids' clothing are so trendy right now. (Why did we not have trendy clothes when we were little?!)

My Top 6 Favorite Books of 2016


I know we're half way through January, but I've made this yearly round up a tradition on my blog. (Better late than never! 😁) Anyway, another year has passed and a collection of pages were flipped. Some books dug their way into my heart, and some books let me into a fun and emotional ride. The books I am about to mention are books that I read within 2016. They are not necessarily published in the year 2016. Also, this post is a mini review or just my general feelings and thoughts about each novel... Without further ado (in no particular order), here are my favorite books of 2016! (Whoa I said "2016" a lot. Oh and this is spoiler free!)
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